I saw my neurologist yesterday, and the outcome wasn’t what I had hoped for.

For one, she is now considering permanent disability and will be informing my work insurance of this decision, which, of course, is causing me stress because I have no clue if they will approve this.

For another, she’s keeping me on the same meds, so status quo until my next appointment in December, if still no improvement, she might even put me back on Botox and Vypeti doing dual treatments at once, yay me!

And lastly, my neurologist shocked me by asking me to dump my migraine calendar. No more tracking headaches, intensity levels, inputting a corresponding number, aura symptoms, exercise, and meds taken onto a spreadsheet to figure out if there is an improvement in it all.

Instead, she is asking me to start a ‘white’ journal, meaning she wants me to journal about the times when I feel good to see if a pattern emerges. A time of day, activity, or people that brightens my mood and lessens the impact of the migraine.

So, if I’m to start journaling and don’t want to start my journal entries with ‘Dear Journal,’ I need to give my migraine a name, and ‘Dear Hell Monster’ sounds a bit dramatic. I might need something more pedestrian. If you have any suggestions for me, please share them in the comments.